where legends are made

Katie Harper – Exploratory Essay

  • July 25th, 2022


For many of you the name Harry Styles does not mean much. Maybe you think of his hit song of the summer “Watermelon Sugar” or his prince-like good looks. For me, however, just hearing this name alone can bring a wave of peace over a hectic day. To me, Harry is more than a singer and more than a pretty face, he is my inspiration in everything I pursue. It all began on the night of March 27th, 2010, when a small boy with giant crater dimples and bouncy curls rocked my eight-year-old little world.

I grew up with only women and never really had a strong male presence in my life. As you can imagine, I was quite the “girly-girl” and loved all things dress-up and sparkles. As I grew older, naturally, my friends all began to gush over their elementary school crushes. I always felt different than them because I never really experienced this. Sure, I thought some of the boys in my class were cute, but I was always afraid of boys even from a young age. Looking back now, I realize much of this is due to me never having experience with males and even having trust-issues with them. I couldn’t wait to get home from school to watch my favorite television show and get a break from hearing my friends talk about their boyfriend of the week.

As time went on, of course I experienced hardship and I got hurt too many times to count. I’m lucky enough to have a mother who doubles as my best friend, but I yearned for a father-figure in my life. I portrayed the way my father treated me onto every man I met and struggled to feel comfortable around any male presence. I was always on high alert around males and never felt safe to be in a room alone with them. This is something that can be very difficult to explain to your friends as an eight-year-old. I felt as if nobody could relate to my problems, and I was the odd-one-out. There were days when everything within me began to crumble. I couldn’t listen to my friends complain about their crush not circling “Yes” on their note they passed them. I couldn’t listen to my teachers complain about how their coffee was cold. I couldn’t take it anymore because I felt as if I was being forced to pretend it wasn’t gut-wrenching that I didn’t and won’t ever have a father figure in the same way my peers did. I won’t ever even have a brother to feel safe with, knowing his main goal is to protect me. I was flailing around, falling off a cliff, grasping for something to cling on to and that’s when I found him. Everything changed when he saved me.

For many girls my age, this night could not be differentiated from any other, but I remember that night so vividly even though it was nearly twelve years ago. I just got home from a strenuous day of fourth grade math and was so excited to turn on my television to watch the X-Factor. I had a passion for singing and the X-Factor was my very favorite talent competition show. My eyes lit up with wonder as I saw a young British boy with a cheeky smile walk on the stage. His name was Harry Styles, he said he took the day off his job at the bakery to audition for the show at just sixteen-years-old. I was already hooked but it made matters even worse when he began to sing “Isn’t She Lovely” be Stevie Wonder in the most adorable accent you’ve ever heard.

From that night on, I began to watch the X-Factor every week and couldn’t wait until Harry made it through to the live votes. On July 23rd, 2010, my dreams came to a screeching halt, or so I thought. The most ruthless judge, Simon Cowell continued to call names of those who made it to the live shows and Harry was left standing on the stage in tears. I couldn’t believe he didn’t make it through. I began to cry with him, this seems silly to some but for me this was the first time I felt a childlike love for someone, and I didn’t want my nights of hearing him sing to end just yet.

That’s when everything changed. Simon Cowell called these names, Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan and…. Harry Styles. Five boys walked back out on stage and just like that the boyband One Direction was formed. I became a superfan of the group, watching all their performances and tuning in to every video diary in between episodes. I fell in love with each of the five boys in the group, but Harry always held a special place in my heart from the beginning.

One Direction went on to have extreme success as a boyband and played sold-out stadium tours across the entire nation. I remained a die-hard fan of them all the way to the bitter end in August of 2015 when they decided to pursue careers as solo artists. I was obviously distraught about the last five years of my life coming to an end, but I was ecstatic to see what Harry would accomplish as a solo artist. I supported all the boys throughout their solo endeavors but nervously waited for Harry to release his first album.

This he did on May 12th, 2017. The soundtracks laced together and took me on a journey through every emotion possible. I felt love, sadness, glee, loss, and anger as I listened to his poetic lyrics and beautifully strung melodies. Even during these heartbreaking tracks, I couldn’t wipe a smile off my face because I finally began to feel like I was at home again. His music just feels so comforting to me, like a warm hug from someone you trust most on a long day. When his second album, Fine Line, came out in 2019 these indescribably overwhelming feelings engulfed me once again. Every time I hear his music and see his smile life seems to get just a little bit better.

Although the rising fame made it difficult, I kept my love for Harry Styles to myself as I grew older. Obviously, I loved to sing his music in the car with my friends, but I never spoke about him too much for the fear that they would make fun of him to me. This is exactly what began to happen in December of 2020 when his Vogue magazine first debuted.

Harry was the talk of the town for being the first male on the cover of American Vogue, but the attention he was getting was anything but positive. Harry posed on the cover in an astounding light blue ballgown with ruffles that made him appear dainty while holding his facial expression in a way that exuded the most tremendous strength. It was nothing short of breathtaking. My heart could’ve burst with pride in that moment. My lifelong hero was conquering his fears and standing in solitary against toxic masculinity.

I opened my Instagram to repost his photo onto my page and was quickly swarmed with posts from other content creators bashing Harry for his photoshoot. Candace Owens seemed to be the main “leader” of what many called the Manly Men Movement. This disgusting attempt of a movement was aimed to bring Harry down for posing in women’s clothing, saying, “there is no society that can survive without strong men. The East knows this. In the west, the steady feminization of our men at the same time that Marxism is being taught to our children is not a coincidence. It is an outright attack” (Owens 2020).

I was outraged as I read these comments and couldn’t help but express my concern to my friends. Chills ran down my body, shocked, as I heard them all agree with the hateful comments. My worst fears were coming true as my friends all made derogatory comments towards him and his choice of style. They asked me questions like “eww why is he wearing that?”; “isn’t he gay?”, “why would you like that?”. I could feel a lump in my throat grow as I held back tears. I thought I knew these people but clearly, their core values did not align with mine.

I then began to ponder about all the times when I have seen men be treated this way and realized what a huge problem it is. Young boys are being conditioned to grow up in a manner where they are deemed masculine or manly. These are the types of boys who grow up to have anger issues, misogynistic tendencies, and homophobia. They are taught that boys must be big and strong, and they must never show signs of weakness or femininity.

Harry Styles broke down these barriers and showed the world it is possible to be bold and tough while also showing emotions and soft aspects of yourself. Simply put, Harry restored my trust in men and allowed me to see the characteristics that I would value in a lifelong partner. My male “heroic figure” is not the superman who can come and save me when I am in distress. My hero will be there for me when I need help and feels no shame in asking for help from me, as well. My hero will not view me as less than capable just because I am a woman, and my hero would not train our son to grow up to be big and strong. He would allow him to be whoever he wants to be whether that’s a quarterback on the football team or a ballet dancer in the Nutcracker.

He shows me that it’s okay to completely be myself. In fact, it’s more than okay it’s admirable and it’s crucial in order to achieve your highest goals. In his Vogue article, he said “many borders are falling – in fashion, but also in music, films and art, I don’t think people are still looking for this gender differentiation. Even if the masculine and feminine exist, their limits are the subject of a game” (Styles 2020). By fearlessly being himself, he allows others to do the same. I hope that he continues to reach the masses of young people in his pursuit of spreading kindness and equality to all.

I hope that everyone is able to find a role model who makes them feel the same way that Harry makes me feel. I vow to continue to educate myself on the barriers that all males experience and the ways in which I can be an ally to them; I plan to research more about the cause of the tendencies of homophobia and toxic masculinity, so that I may discover solutions to them. I truly believe that we are the generation of change and Harry Styles is just one of the many amazing leaders within it. Now, it is our duty to follow in their footsteps and actively put a stop to modern toxic masculinity, so that we may raise our young men to express themselves freely without the worry of harassment or bullying.

Bianco, M., & Critic, C. (2020, November 17). Candace Owens, Harry STYLES’ Vogue cover and the tyranny of the gender binary. NBCNews.com. https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/candace-owens-harry-styles-vogue-cover-tyranny-gender-binary-ncna1247953.

McNamara, B. (2019, December 5). Harry styles is very ready for gender norms to fade away. British Vogue. https://www.vogue.co.uk/miss-vogue/article/harry-styles-gender-norms.

Categories: Uncategorized

Katie Harper – Exploratory Essay

  • July 25th, 2022

For many of you the name Harry Styles does not mean much. Maybe you think of his hit song of the summer “Watermelon Sugar” or his prince-like good looks. For me, however, just hearing this name alone can bring a wave of peace over a hectic day. To me, Harry is more than a singer and more than a pretty face, he is my inspiration in everything I pursue. It all began on the night of March 27th, 2010, when a small boy with giant crater dimples and bouncy curls rocked my eight-year-old little world.

I grew up with only women and never really had a strong male presence in my life. As you can imagine, I was quite the “girly-girl” and loved all things dress-up and sparkles. As I grew older, naturally, my friends all began to gush over their elementary school crushes. I always felt different than them because I never really experienced this. Sure, I thought some of the boys in my class were cute, but I was always afraid of boys even from a young age. Looking back now, I realize much of this is due to me never having experience with males and even having trust-issues with them. I couldn’t wait to get home from school to watch my favorite television show and get a break from hearing my friends talk about their boyfriend of the week.

As time went on, of course I experienced hardship and I got hurt too many times to count. I’m lucky enough to have a mother who doubles as my best friend, but I yearned for a father-figure in my life. I portrayed the way my father treated me onto every man I met and struggled to feel comfortable around any male presence. I was always on high alert around males and never felt safe to be in a room alone with them. This is something that can be very difficult to explain to your friends as an eight-year-old. I felt as if nobody could relate to my problems, and I was the odd-one-out. There were days when everything within me began to crumble. I couldn’t listen to my friends complain about their crush not circling “Yes” on their note they passed them. I couldn’t listen to my teachers complain about how their coffee was cold. I couldn’t take it anymore because I felt as if I was being forced to pretend it wasn’t gut-wrenching that I didn’t and won’t ever have a father figure in the same way my peers did. I won’t ever even have a brother to feel safe with, knowing his main goal is to protect me. I was flailing around, falling off a cliff, grasping for something to cling on to and that’s when I found him. Everything changed when he saved me.

For many girls my age, this night could not be differentiated from any other, but I remember that night so vividly even though it was nearly twelve years ago. I just got home from a strenuous day of fourth grade math and was so excited to turn on my television to watch the X-Factor. I had a passion for singing and the X-Factor was my very favorite talent competition show. My eyes lit up with wonder as I saw a young British boy with a cheeky smile walk on the stage. His name was Harry Styles, he said he took the day off his job at the bakery to audition for the show at just sixteen-years-old. I was already hooked but it made matters even worse when he began to sing “Isn’t She Lovely” be Stevie Wonder in the most adorable accent you’ve ever heard.

From that night on, I began to watch the X-Factor every week and couldn’t wait until Harry made it through to the live votes. On July 23rd, 2010, my dreams came to a screeching halt, or so I thought. The most ruthless judge, Simon Cowell continued to call names of those who made it to the live shows and Harry was left standing on the stage in tears. I couldn’t believe he didn’t make it through. I began to cry with him, this seems silly to some but for me this was the first time I felt a childlike love for someone, and I didn’t want my nights of hearing him sing to end just yet.

That’s when everything changed. Simon Cowell called these names, Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan and…. Harry Styles. Five boys walked back out on stage and just like that the boyband One Direction was formed. I became a superfan of the group, watching all their performances and tuning in to every video diary in between episodes. I fell in love with each of the five boys in the group, but Harry always held a special place in my heart from the beginning.

One Direction went on to have extreme success as a boyband and played sold-out stadium tours across the entire nation. I remained a die-hard fan of them all the way to the bitter end in August of 2015 when they decided to pursue careers as solo artists. I was obviously distraught about the last five years of my life coming to an end, but I was ecstatic to see what Harry would accomplish as a solo artist. I supported all the boys throughout their solo endeavors but nervously waited for Harry to release his first album.

This he did on May 12th, 2017. The soundtracks laced together and took me on a journey through every emotion possible. I felt love, sadness, glee, loss, and anger as I listened to his poetic lyrics and beautifully strung melodies. Even during these heartbreaking tracks, I couldn’t wipe a smile off my face because I finally began to feel like I was at home again. His music just feels so comforting to me, like a warm hug from someone you trust most on a long day. When his second album, Fine Line, came out in 2019 these indescribably overwhelming feelings engulfed me once again. Every time I hear his music and see his smile life seems to get just a little bit better.

Although the rising fame made it difficult, I kept my love for Harry Styles to myself as I grew older. Obviously, I loved to sing his music in the car with my friends, but I never spoke about him too much for the fear that they would make fun of him to me. This is exactly what began to happen in December of 2020 when his Vogue magazine first debuted.

Harry was the talk of the town for being the first male on the cover of American Vogue, but the attention he was getting was anything but positive. Harry posed on the cover in an astounding light blue ballgown with ruffles that made him appear dainty while holding his facial expression in a way that exuded the most tremendous strength. It was nothing short of breathtaking. My heart could’ve burst with pride in that moment. My lifelong hero was conquering his fears and standing in solitary against toxic masculinity.

I opened my Instagram to repost his photo onto my page and was quickly swarmed with posts from other content creators bashing Harry for his photoshoot. Candace Owens seemed to be the main “leader” of what many called the Manly Men Movement. This disgusting attempt of a movement was aimed to bring Harry down for posing in women’s clothing, saying, “there is no society that can survive without strong men. The East knows this. In the west, the steady feminization of our men at the same time that Marxism is being taught to our children is not a coincidence. It is an outright attack” (Owens 2020).

I was outraged as I read these comments and couldn’t help but express my concern to my friends. Chills ran down my body, shocked, as I heard them all agree with the hateful comments. My worst fears were coming true as my friends all made derogatory comments towards him and his choice of style. They asked me questions like “eww why is he wearing that?”; “isn’t he gay?”, “why would you like that?”. I could feel a lump in my throat grow as I held back tears. I thought I knew these people but clearly, their core values did not align with mine.

I then began to ponder about all the times when I have seen men be treated this way and realized what a huge problem it is. Young boys are being conditioned to grow up in a manner where they are deemed masculine or manly. These are the types of boys who grow up to have anger issues, misogynistic tendencies, and homophobia. They are taught that boys must be big and strong, and they must never show signs of weakness or femininity.

Harry Styles broke down these barriers and showed the world it is possible to be bold and tough while also showing emotions and soft aspects of yourself. Simply put, Harry restored my trust in men and allowed me to see the characteristics that I would value in a lifelong partner. My male “heroic figure” is not the superman who can come and save me when I am in distress. My hero will be there for me when I need help and feels no shame in asking for help from me, as well. My hero will not view me as less than capable just because I am a woman, and my hero would not train our son to grow up to be big and strong. He would allow him to be whoever he wants to be whether that’s a quarterback on the football team or a ballet dancer in the Nutcracker.

He shows me that it’s okay to completely be myself. In fact, it’s more than okay it’s admirable and it’s crucial in order to achieve your highest goals. In his Vogue article, he said “many borders are falling – in fashion, but also in music, films and art, I don’t think people are still looking for this gender differentiation. Even if the masculine and feminine exist, their limits are the subject of a game” (Styles 2020). By fearlessly being himself, he allows others to do the same. I hope that he continues to reach the masses of young people in his pursuit of spreading kindness and equality to all.

I hope that everyone is able to find a role model who makes them feel the same way that Harry makes me feel. I vow to continue to educate myself on the barriers that all males experience and the ways in which I can be an ally to them; I plan to research more about the cause of the tendencies of homophobia and toxic masculinity, so that I may discover solutions to them. I truly believe that we are the generation of change and Harry Styles is just one of the many amazing leaders within it. Now, it is our duty to follow in their footsteps and actively put a stop to modern toxic masculinity, so that we may raise our young men to express themselves freely without the worry of harassment or bullying.

Bianco, M., & Critic, C. (2020, November 17). Candace Owens, Harry STYLES’ Vogue cover and the tyranny of the gender binary. NBCNews.com. https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/candace-owens-harry-styles-vogue-cover-tyranny-gender-binary-ncna1247953.

McNamara, B. (2019, December 5). Harry styles is very ready for gender norms to fade away. British Vogue. https://www.vogue.co.uk/miss-vogue/article/harry-styles-gender-norms.